If there’s one thing you need to know about me, it’s that I love creepy things. Scary movies, dark books, spooky occult stories told by a lit fire in the woods, the whole shebang. I’ve always been drawn to creepy things. My favorite game to play with Barbies was aliens and my favorite show to watch with my mother was Charmed.

So naturally, creepy doesn’t phase me. Most people would be paralyzed or run in the opposite direction in the face of horror; I smile and invite it with open arms. So, trust me when I say I know creepy, and Devilish by Maureen Johnson is utterly horrifying.

Devilish revolves around these two friends at a Catholic girls school in Massechuttes who befriend the new transfer student (aka the premise for a lot of YA horror stories). While the title and the cover – a girl smiling creepily while holding a cupcake – may seem innocent (a bit sinister, but innocent enough), the first page will definitely change your mind. The opening scene starts with the protagonist slicing her own toes off and dying on the side of the couch. 11-year-old me was not prepared for that – even at 20, that beginning still baffles me.

Devilish was the first book that thoroughly creeped me out – like I couldn’t go to sleep without thinking of this book creeped me out – but it did introduce me to a lot of really good horror styles that I love to this day and include in my writing. Johnson’s use of a young narrator and the narrator’s emotions made the reader begin to doubt everything she told us, transforming her into an unreliable narrator before the true horror elements even sank in. It’s a story that I still think about and I read that book 9 years ago.

Should I have been reading that book at a young age? No. Should my middle school library have had that book? No. Did it fundamentally impact the media I consume and satisfy my love of horror? Yes. But one thing’s for certain though.

I’ve never looked at a cupcake the same since.